gurf.com - humor - Consistency

     Susie called. “Hello,” she said.
    “What’s up, Lavenderpetal?”
    “I was wondering if you’ve had any luck selling your stamp collection. You’re asking fifteen bucks?”
    “Had to settle for five. But you’d be surprised at how far that goes at Aldi. Had a real lunch today. Now if I could only get more advertisers for this site.”
    “What’s the problem? There are tons of companies with banners.”
    “The last three turned me down.”
    “Why?”
    “Can’t appreciate genius I guess. I don’t know. They don’t really tell you why.”
    “The site is a tad crude.”
    “Crude?”
    “Look at the header for instance. It looks like it was whacked out in ten minutes. The lettering. The cutesy monster.”
    “That’s no monster. That’s Gurfee, the gurf.com mascot. This is a small site. I wanted an impromptu, hip-hop look.”
    “Gigawit is small. Look how clean and professional they look— with animation even.”
    “They have half a million bucks to play with. I have Microsoft’s Paint.”
    “And what’s with the navigation? Skinny buttons on either side of the cartoon. One for Previous Posting but no Next. What’s the deal there?”
    “Consistency. The site’s brilliant because it’s uniformly inane. It makes little sense, so it makes a lot of sense. The navigation can’t be logical or it would be out of whack with the rest of the site— excuse me, there’s someone at the door.”
    “Got company?”
    “Two guys I’ve never seen before. I don’t like the looks of this. Hold on a minute. (Offline— Get away from me! Don’t put that on! Those straps are too tight!)”
    “What’s going on? Are you all right?”
    “It’s okay. They just want to help me.”

~ Gurf