gurf.com - humor - Bladder Trouble

     Wendy called, “Hi Gurf.”
    “What’s up, Teekyfeather?”
    “Not much. Wondering how things are going at your new job. Chimney-sweep apprentice or whatever.”
    “Just to hold me till my IPO— Namedance.com.”
    “When will that be?”
    “Soon as my niece finishes printing the stock certificates on her toy printing press. Won’t be long. She needs the ten-spot for a trip to Six Flags.”
    “In the meantime how goes it with the brooms and funny hats?”
    “Well there’s good news and there’s bad news. Which do you want first?”
    “The bad news.”
    “Okay— I’ve been canned.”
    “Canned? Why?”
    “Bladder trouble.”
    “Bladder trouble?”
    “It’s not what you think. These are bladders that we use for pouring cement. Long tubes of thick rubber. You inflate them inside the chimney, pour cement, deflate them, take them out, and you have a nice new concrete-lined flue.”
    “I’m afraid to ask what went wrong.”
    “First I forgot to put the stuff on that makes them easier to get out. Then I didn’t run the pressure up high enough. The next day they wouldn’t budge.”
    “I suppose you had to winch them out?”
    “Tried everything. Couldn’t leave them, they’re flammable. Finally decided on a controlled burn. Blowtorch from bottomside. Flames must have shot a hundred feet out of that chimney. TV news even turned up.”
    “Everyone’s allowed a mistake or two.”
    “Those things cost a couple hundred apiece, and we’re broke as it is.”
    “What’s the good news?”
    “Not having bladders meant we didn’t need the compressor. So we stopped by Broad Street Pawn and borrowed forty bucks. After gassing up the truck and getting a bite to eat, there was enough left for a fifth of Yellowstone.”

~ Gurf