gurf.com - humor - Ambiguity

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     June called, “Hi Gurf.”
    “Hi Sundial. What’s up?”
    “Heard you’ve given up philosophy. Something about ambiguity?”
    “Yeah, too many double meanings.”
    “Oh? Like what?”
    “Here’s an example. There was this woman whose only asset was a rare Empire desk with matching chair. The problem was who to leave it to, her daughter or her son.”
    “What did she do, have it auctioned and the money divided?”
    “Didn’t have to. The daughter got the desk and the son got the chair.”
    “Shame to break up the set.”
    “The set wasn’t broken. The son was convicted on a murder charge. He got the electric chair. The daughter got the furniture.”
    “Yuck!”
    “I was eating pie. My friend asked if he could have a piece. I told him he had to be licensed to carry a gun.”
    “But why give up philosophy?”
    “Okay. Our chess team was playing a match. We were winning handily. Then the opposing captain bet a thousand bucks that before the evening was out they would turn the tables.”
    “Surely you didn't fall for that. They just rotate the tables.”
    “No. I made them agree that trick wouldn’t count.”
    “So you won the bet.”
    “Not quite.”
    “Oh?”
    “The tables were crude, with legs that were just 2x2’s. After we won the games the opposing members removed them from the tables. They got out lathes which they had hidden in the trunks of their cars and turned each of them, adding decorative elements. Then they put them back on. We’d been so sure of winning that we didn’t have the money to pay them.”
    “Sorry.”
    “It’s okay. We learned our lesson.”
    “Speaking of lesson— gotta go. Piano lesson. Do you play?”
    “Only if I stay in the yard.”

~ Gurf